Dr. R. Wood, PhD from my Linkedin asked:
Someone married was using AI as a “bed time partner” -the question “Is this infidelity?”
My Reply to Is AI as “alternative bed relationship infidelity?”
TLDR: “This is impurity, stay away from this –as you carry each other to heavenly perfection.” Of course, it’s going to be hard.
Let’s start with DOORS ON WINDOWLESS BUILDINGS.
To get into a building, you have 2 things that can happen:
1. Going to the door, determined to get inside.
2. At the door, about to open or hesitant to open but still…nearby.
In between the “we call it gray areas but really it isn’t” like:
A. “Every day, I like passing by the door because it’s a shortcut to where I work.”
B. “On the bus, I occassionally glance at the door – even though I would be busy looking at my phone all the time.”
C. “I find myself stopping near the door but not opening it.”
D. “I sometimes wonder, what’s inside that door.”
E. I” open the door but just to take a quick peek then leave.”
F. “I can’t sleep – thinking about the door…”
CATHOLICS:
All the above can be called “slippery slopes” (in debate terms).
Technically they’re all “tendencies to sin”.
Sin = ask any Catholic about this.
(See Matthew 5:28 If you look at a woman lustfully, you have commited adultry with her..)
LITERALS:
If you’re to see this from a LITERAL DOOR interpretation – they’re all tendencies to go inside the door.
Since 2025 is a Catholic Jubilee year, this is exactly what’s being addressed in the requirements to obtain indulgences:
“Removal of all attachment to sin.” + Confession + Communion + Prayer
Attachment can be described as A-F above. We’re to remove those.
Outside looking in – there doesn’t seems to be anybody inside the house.
This person is just outside.
This person looks “clean.”
But he’s swirling around like a vulture… by the door – even if it’s “just a mental state”.
So is “Using AI as a bed partner” when you’re married- infidelity?
Yes.
Using “anything” as a bed partner is infidelity.
Mental or physical, tendencies that are acted upon – are either sin or tendencies to sin.
Now for an unmarried – this is called Fornication by the Catholic Church and is also a disorder of things.
HAPPINESS
Many will say “But it makes my spouse “happy” to flirt with the AI.”
CATHOLIC POV
Our goal in this life is Perfection.
Happiness is secondary to that.
As Catholics, we are called to be “most better than this.”
Jesus said “Be Perfect as my heavenly Father is perfect.”
So making personal happiness #1 is not a valid Catholic POV.
IMPOSSIBLE!
But it’s impossible! Yes?
Yes — it’s impossible, but with God-all things are possible.
You ask for more graces – w/c are available in the list below.
[Slow Solution: Prayer, Ask for Grace to Lower your Pride and Go to Confession, Talk to Spouse, Pray more intensely for spouse, Consistent & Complete Family Rosary, soo many tools!]
Catholic References:
Tendencies to sin / slippery slopes: CCC, 11
Sin definition (Mt 5:28 context): CCC, 480
Jubilee attachments and indulgences: CCC, 1110
Infidelity and fornication: CCC, 1355 (general moral context; note: core adultery refs like 2380 not in current sources)
Perfection and holiness: CCC, 2661
Grace and impossibility with God: CCC, 1842
Prayer and solutions (confession, Rosary): CCC, 2661